Making Book: By Any Other Name

(With apologies to Teresa Nielsen Hayden)

I'm terrible at coming up with story titles. If you've read more than a couple of 512s, you already know this; my typical go-tos are song titles (e.g., "Don't Fence Me In") or the titles of SF/F novels (e.g., "Stranger in a Strange Land"). Because you can't copyright a title, and I'm lazy. I also like re-using existing phrases, because I can then exploit that emotional resonance. Or just turn it into an awful pun. Both are good.

For this book, however, I wanted something that was at least a little more evocative and meaningful. I'm not a big fan of one-word titles, which can seem very generic, but I also didn't want something too long, since I planned to add some kind of explanatory subtitle to describe the content (i.e., to make it clear that this was a short fiction collection).

Because I am so very lazy, I procrastinated on this until DeeAnn and I started working with our friend and awesome artist Natalie Metzger on the cover and interior illustrations. I'll talk more about that process next week, but she was invaluable in helping me nail down the title and also figure out exactly what images should go on the cover.

Long story short, the relevant portion of our e-mail conversation went roughly like this:

Natalie: Have you come up with a title yet?

Me: ...

(three days pass)

Me: How about SUCCESSFUL EXPERIMENTS? Or WRITTEN ON THURSDAY? And here's a mock-up which is not very good. :)

(image attachment sent)

DeeAnn: I like WRITTEN ON THURSDAYS. And I agree, that mock-up is not good. ;)

(the next day)

Natalie: How about THURSDAY STORIES? I like how the day sounds in the title.

Me: I've got it... THURSDAY'S CHILDREN!

(End of scene.)

So there you are: the title of the book will be Thursday's Children: Flash Fiction from 512 Words or Fewer. It's not strictly a "best of" collection, as I explained last week, but it does include many of the most interesting and successful results of my often late-night weekly writing sessions--which usually happened on Thursdays. And some of them have grown up to become longer works, but many others are still developing.

In case you're curious about the mock-up image which I sent as part of the e-mail thread cited above: That's directly related to Natalie's artwork, and I'll show you how next week.

Making Book: Selection Criteria

(With apologies to Teresa Nielsen Hayden)

The 512 collection DeeAnn and I are publishing next month will include one hundred and seventeen stories out of the two hundred and fifty-six from my weekly blog. Why aren't we including all the stories? The main reasons are:

1. Some have been or will be published elsewhere.
2. Some are in the process of becoming longer finished works (e.g., novels).
3. Some of them just weren't very good.

So given all that, how did we pick the stories to include? First, we each rated all the stories independently.



In hindsight, we should have synced up on our rating methods beforehand, because I only used integers (0==no, 1==maybe, 2==yes) and DeeAnn used rational numbers between 0 and 2, inclusive. But we averaged the scores anyway, and discussed any wildly divergent scores or right-in-the-middle ratings.

After we agreed on the set of stories to include, we had to decide on an order in which to present them. To that end, DeeAnn created a new spreadsheet where she summarized each 512 in a logline, and also noted the general theme of each piece and whether it was a strong candidate for an opener or a closer.



Out of all that data, she distilled the themes down to six major sections. Then I took a stab at sorting the sections and stories. (Note my clever use of an old BASIC line numbering trick--i.e., using increasing but non-consecutive numbers to allow later additions--which would have much more useful if I had started doing it before I was halfway through the spreadsheet.)



At that point, we knew exactly what content would be in the book, even if we weren't yet sure about the final order. I spent a few days copying the text of all 117 stories into a Scrivener project, using that latest spreadsheet as a guide, and now we can make whatever tweaks we need to while looking at the actual, mostly formatted text.

So now we have a book, more or less. Yay! What are we going to call it? I'll talk about that next week.

Making Book: Teaser

(With apologies to Teresa Nielsen Hayden)

I don't think I ever made a formal announcement about this, so here it is: a collection of stories from 512 Words or Fewer will be available next month, as a print-on-demand trade paperback or e-book edition. I'm aiming for an official release on Friday, January 31st (which happens to coincide with the Lunar New Year).

Note that this is not a "best of" collection. Certainly some of the best 512s are included, but I've turned other great pieces into longer stories for submission to paying markets. For example, I recently sold "Somebody's Daughter," a Jake and Andy novelette (13,400 words) which started with "Who's Your Daddy?". The expanded story will be in the next issue (#65) of Leading Edge Magazine, and you should all go buy that when it comes out. :)

Anyway, I'm going to post every Friday from now until the 512 book launches with some background info on its creation. DeeAnn helped me select the stories, I love the title we came up with, and there's going to be spectacular cover and interior artwork by our friend Natalie. Stay tuned for details on all that and more!

Free to Good Home

Did you know that my short story "Don't Fence Me In" is featured in the Song Stories: Blaze of Glory anthology? And did you further know that said anthology is a FREE Kindle download this weekend (through Monday, September 30th, 2013)?

And if you simply must have a physical artifact, you may purchase a trade paperback edition of Song Stories: Blaze of Glory for the paltry sum of eight dollars and ninety-nine cents (plus tax and shipping, if applicable). Your book will be made to order, or "printed on demand," if you will. What marvels this brave new century hath delivered!


P.S. Tuesday is my 40th birthday, and I'd like your help with an unrelated project: would you kindly tell me how we met? (If you've already responded, feel free to encourage someone else to do it. I'd love to hear from one hundred people before Tuesday, and we're so close!)


P.P.S. Yeah, yeah, I know. "That's what she said."

Go West, Young 512

Hey, remember "Don't Fence Me?" Well, it took a while, but I turned that 512 into a longer version (3,600 words) and submitted it to various markets. After fifteen rejections, it found a home in the anthology Song Stories: Blaze of Glory--which is now available in trade paperback and on Kindle!

The anthology also includes a story from fellow Pacific Northwest writer Camille Griep, who organizes the annual Cascade Writers workshop!

Every story in this collection is a "weird Western" inspired by a particular piece of music, which each author describes in an afterword. I couldn't include a music video with my afterword, but here's my song:


https://vimeo.com/11355379

I built the longer story around the same emotional core as the original 512, but added a lot of depth, if I do say so myself. There's more of all the main characters, an extended ending, and a new opening scene. Here's the first line:

The first time I met Horace Granger, he almost got killed by a magic bullet.

Want to read the whole thing, and six other song stories?

Buy Blaze of Glory in paperback ($9)

Buy Blaze of Glory on Kindle ($3)

"The End"

THE END
By Curtis C. Chen

God woke up on Saturday morning, went downstairs to check on her animals, then stomped into the kitchen. Satan stood at the counter, fussing with the French press.

"What happened to my terrarium?" God asked.

"I didn't touch your pets," Satan said without turning around.

"They're not pets," God said. "And that ecosystem is very delicately balanced—"

"Okay, eco-sphere, whatever." Satan carefully filled his insulated travel mug. "Your aquarium was blocking the screen. I had to move it so we could watch the game."

"You moved it next to the wine cooler," God said. "Interior temperature dropped by half. Most of the reptiles are dead."

"Are you sure they're not just hibernating?"

"Oh, you're a herpetologist now? And would it kill you to clean up after your little boys' club meetings?"

Satan frowned at God. "Geez, what crawled up your ass and died? Is is that time of the month again?"

"I'm going to forget you said that," God said. She glared at Satan's suit and tie. "You really need to go in today?"

"Yes," he said. "Conference call with Asia. Time zones. Can't be helped. Don't worry, I'll be back before seven."

"What happens at seven?"

"Oh, for Pete's sake." Satan grabbed his briefcase. "Dinner with Lucy and Geoff! Reservations at the Garden? Remember?"

"Yeah." God fidgeted. "Sorry I've been distracted this week."

"It's been more than a week," Satan muttered, and slammed the front door shut.

God ate two granola bars and drank a bottle of water, then returned to her experiment. The mammals which had survived last night's big freeze were quite resilient, and she wanted to see what would happen if she made them more complex.

The phone rang at five-thirty. God put it on speaker, but had trouble understanding what her husband was saying. It sounded like Satan was driving.

"I'll be ready to go soon," God shouted at the phone.

"No," Satan said. "Listen! There's been a change of plan. I didn't want to do this over the phone, but—this marriage is not working."

God was only half-listening. Her attention was focused on extracting bone marrow from a sedated male specimen, which she could use to create a female clone. "I'm sorry I've been busy. I'll take tomorrow off, I promise."

"That's not the point! Dammit, how do I say this?"

"Just hang up," came a female voice through the speaker. "She doesn't care."

God frowned. "Is that Lucy?"

"You had your chance, honey!" Lucy said. "He's mine now!"

"Okay, stop," Satan said. "You're making it worse."

God put down her instruments. "Where's Geoff?"

"Probably still at the office," Satan said. "Look. Baby. I'm sorry, but I can't do this anymore. I need someone who's more attentive, more invested in our relationship."

"You should have sucked his dick more!" Lucy said, giggling.

"Really not helping!" Satan said. "I'm sorry. We're leaving. This is the end."

The line went dead. God turned back to her work.

"No," she said, watching as the male and female shared a piece of fruit. God smiled. "This is just the beginning."



Photo Credit: Anua22a via Compfight cc

Wait for it...

We spent all day driving from Portland to Palo Alto, so I'm a little behind on work. The final 512 will be up, oh, let's say mid-afternoon today.

Thanks for your patience, and thanks for reading.

Meanwhile, for no apparent reason, here's a picture of a marsupial.





Photo Credit: Tambako the Jaguar via Compfight cc

I Wanna Be Your Sledgehammer

ETA (22 Sep 2013): The Readers' Choice Poll is now closed. Winners will be announced soon!

ETA (22 Aug 2013): The Readers’ Choice Poll is now up at sledgehammercontest.com! Look in the left column for the ballot of eligible stories (including mine, "Born to the Legion"). Vote until September 21st!

ETA (21 Aug 2013): You can now read "Born to the Legion" online, as well all the other Sledgehammer 2013 submissions. Voting form coming soon!



Portlandia residents: If you're free tonight at 7:00 PM, join me and other writers at Blackbird Wine & Atomic Cheese for three-minute readings from this past weekend's Sledgehammer 36-Hour Writing Contest! I'll be reading the opening of my talking-animals-at-war story, "Born to the Legion."

Everyone else: Visit the www.sledgehammercontest.com and vote for the Readers' Choice Award (coming soon; polls open until September 18th)!

The writing prompts, given during Saturday's scavenger hunt, were:

1. An animal trainer
2. "Don't eat that!"
3. Cornfields
4. Doughnuts
5. Spending $4
6. Owls

And yes, I did spend way too much time watching video clips from Twin Peaks, and the working title was "The Owls Are Not What They Seem." Then I got halfway through the draft and completely changed the MacGuffin that drives the story. (Spoiler alert: it's pretty much just an episode of Stargate now. It's what I do.)

All of this year's contest entries will be posted at sledgehammercontest.com next month.